Surrogacy Process
Surrogacy: A Step-by-Step Guide
Hope you like a good list, because we’re about to dive into the LIST OF ALL LISTS. Welcome to your step-by-step surrogacy guide, AKA your roadmap to the adventure that could become one of the most exciting and fulfilling chapters of your life.
Here’s what you should know:
Every mom’s surrogacy journey follows its own timeline. Control freaks, take a deep breath.
And while every path is unique, each surrogate hits the same celebratory milestones in her journey—it’s what makes it easy for us to relate to and support one another.
We're here for you, starting day one!
On that note, let’s talk about how we welcome and support you from the get-go.
Complete the Surrogate Application & Ask, Are the Stars Aligning?
Step one of becoming a surrogate: Fill out your compatibility form. You’ll answer questions like, “Are you between the ages of 21-42?” and “Do you live in a state other than Nebraska and Louisiana?” Easy peasy!
Meet Experienced Surrogates
Not that we’re keeping score, but if you’ve made it to this step, you’ve passed the first phase with flying colors and now you get to meet other (amazing, kind, humble) women who have been in your shoes. Your Q+A with seasoned surrogates will be a safe space to ask questions. By the way, no question is too big, too small, or TMI.
Share About Your Health, History, Past Pregnancies, & Favorite Spice Girl
If you’ve made it to this step, surrogacy may be a good match for you — YAY! Now’s the time to tell us your life story. Seriously. Between an application and a conversation, we’ll want to know everything you can tell us about your past pregnancies, health concerns, hobbies, and likes and dislikes (no judgment here). It’s going to get a little personal, but part of being a surrogate is really putting yourself out there.
Meet With Us & Talk About Agency Matching & Next Steps in the Process
This step involves literal FaceTime (or Zoom) and more face time with the people you may be getting to know over the next 18 months. We will have a full intake call with you to discuss the process, your background, goals for your surrogacy journey and from there, will make sure we match you to a like-minded agency with like-minded intended parents. It’s an exciting time for all involved!
Match With a Surrogacy Agency
You are here! It’s agency matching time! The goal isn’t to match you with the first agency but to match you with the right-for-you agency. You’ll consider: if your values align, the kind of support the agency offers, and the types of parents they can match you with. When we find the right fit, we’ll introduce you and tell them how amazing you are! Once you match with an agency, they will walk you through a social work and psychological screening process.
Match With Intended Parent(s)
Get ready to meet the (intended) parents! Once an agency has green-lighted you as a potential surrogate, the process moves forward into the matching with intended parents milestone. You’ll create a profile that shows who you are and what you’re looking for in a surrogacy match and journey. It makes getting to know each other just a bit easier. Sort of like online dating!
After surrogates and parents favorite each other’s profiles, they can choose to move forward with a video chat if both parties feel they might be a good match. PS: Don’t be surprised if an agency asks a few more questions down the line; they just want to get to know you even better!
Follow Through on Screening Tests, Legal Work & Your First Milestone Trip
Once you’re happily matched with your intended parents, it’s time to learn more about your IVF journey, which means you’re one step closer to pregnancy! You can also check your first travel milestone off the list—a visit to your intended parents’ IVF clinic for a full medical screening. You’ll work with your legal counsel to negotiate your surrogacy agreement. Once all parties are in sync and the doctor gives the OK, you are officially matched and ready to move forward!
Start Your IVF Journey, AKA Shots, Shots, Shots
Sadly, these are not the party kind of shots. But we’re here to share our tips and tricks if you’re not crazy about needles (really, who is?). After you’ve been cleared by your intended parents’ IVF clinic, they’ll prep you by explaining the medications you’ll need to get your body ready for pregnancy.
Pineapples, French Fries, & Lucky Socks, Oh My!
Okay, that’s an inside joke, but one that’ll make more sense on embryo transfer day! This is a big deal in the surrogacy world, so much so that there are a few traditions you’ll get to make your own. During this milestone trip, you and your support person will head to your intended parents’ IVF clinic again. This trip will last anywhere from 4-7 days, and you may even get to meet your intended parents in person for the first time! In addition to that first meeting, you’ll arrive at one of the biggest days in your surrogacy journey — the day the embryo is transferred! After the transfer, you’ll spend a few days resting and hopefully getting pregnant!! Eek!
Tick Tock…Your Two-Week Wait Begins
After embryo transfer day, you’ll go back home and start “the two-week wait” (TWW). At the end of those two weeks, you’ll go to your local clinic for a beta test (blood test) to see if the embryo transfer was successful. If your levels are where they need to be, you will be considered pregnant…hooray! If you’re not pregnant, the intended parents’ IVF doctors will determine the best next steps.
All Things Pregnancy
If you are pregnant— congrats!! Time to bask in that glow as you grow. In addition to focusing on having a healthy pregnancy, you’ll spend this step deepening your relationship with your intended parents and establishing care for your pregnancy with your OBGYN.
Towards the second half of your pregnancy, you, your intended parents, and your agency will come up with a birthing plan that works for everyone involved.
Giving Birth & Life After Surrogacy
YOU DID IT! We always knew you could! Once you’ve given birth, you’ll enter the fourth trimester. While we definitely want to help you ease back into your life, we also want to celebrate just how transformative and magnificent you were through this journey (sparkly crown optional). You helped grow a family. We’ll be there checking in on you and ensuring you have everything you need to ease yourself back into “normal” life.
These steps focus on becoming a surrogate and enjoying the experience while it happens. Visit our surrogacy timeline page to learn more about how long each step typically takes.
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Blog Posts
A 9-to-5 Guide for Employed Surrogates: How Does Surrogacy Work Legally?
Learn more about the legal considerations for surrogacy, including workplace rights and how to talk to your employer.
Surrogacy Requirements: Can You Be a Surrogate If You Had a C-Section?
Learn how agencies evaluate delivery history and what makes you an eligible surrogate.
Your Guide to Surrogacy Travel: Navigating Appointments, Delivery & More
Travel is sometimes part of the surrogacy experience, from clinic appointments to delivery planning. Here’s what to expect and how agencies make it easy.
"My surrogacy journey was wonderful, especially once I was officially matched with my intended parents. It was important to me that I found intended parents who felt like we could be friends. This helped so much throughout the journey."
Susie
"Do it! If you are thinking about it, now is the time. Don’t let this moment pass you by."
Geneviève
"I knew I wanted to carry for LGBTQ+ IP(s) because I wanted to put more love and acceptance into the world. What better way to multiply love than to help build families?"
Jodie
"It was a journey through and through. There were ups and downs, bumps and delays, and the hardest pregnancy to date, but never once did I waiver in why I was doing this."