Who Are The Intended Parents That Surrogates Help?
Throughout the surrogacy process, we talk a lot about the surrogate (you!) and baby, but the other essential party involved in this journey are the intended parents.
Becoming a parent through surrogacy is an emotional and rewarding path to parenthood. Intended parents put their trust into their surrogate and the surrogacy process. As you think about becoming a surrogate, let's take a look at who intended parents are, so you can get a sense of who you might be helping experience the joys of parenthood.
Who are intended parents?
Intended parents (often referred to as IPs) are people who need assistance building their families, and they’ve chosen surrogacy as their path to parenthood.
Intended parents come from all gender identities and walks of life, including:
Couples in a heterosexual relationship who are struggling to conceive on their own
Individuals or couples that are a part of the LGBTQIA+ community
Domestic or international individuals or couples
People of all races, ethnicities, and religions
One thing they all have in common? They’re extremely grateful for women like you who help build their families.
Why do intended parents choose surrogacy?
Here are some of the most common reasons intended parents choose surrogacy:
Inability to carry their own children to full term
High-risk conditions that make it difficult for intended parents to conceive on their own
A preference for surrogacy over adoption at this stage in their life
A desire to be involved in the pregnancy of their child, which they can do with you as a surrogate!
How involved are intended parents in the surrogacy process?
An intended parents’ involvement in the surrogacy process varies, depending on the IPs’ preferences for communication during the journey. In most cases, Intended parents want to ensure a surrogate has everything she needs to feel comfortable and supported throughout her pregnancy, which is a very good thing for everyone involved.
Your surrogate agreement will help outline boundaries and expectations around the surrogate and intended parents' relationship. This will guarantee that everyone is on a similar page about communication (how often and how much) and even what the relationship might look like after the birth. In our experience, intended parents wish to be as involved as they can be in the surrogacy process as they learn to bond with their surrogate and baby.
Here are some ways that intended parents may choose to be involved in the surrogacy and with their surrogate:
Text messages or video conversations to check in throughout the pregnancy
If the intended parents have a gender reveal or baby shower, the surrogate may be invited to attend
Forming deeper connections with the surrogate’s own family
Attending a surrogate’s ultrasound appointments or otherwise supporting her medical experiences
Dinners or get-to-know-you excursions when you visit their IVF clinic for appointments
Now that you know more about who intended parents are, you can begin to think about your matching preferences and who you think you may want to help. The answer may be: "I'll help anyone!" and that's perfectly ok too!